Equality

There are times that we are reminded of our place. Sometimes it’s a good thing and it humbles us back to were we belong. Being aware and concious of who I am in this reality is something I take pride in and have a habit of calling people who drive with cellphones to their ears or while talking to salespeople unconcious. It’s become my favorite term for them.

Sometimes when we are reminded of our place it is a reminder of our state of society and it’s a sad state in some areas. A very sad state.

The incident that is bringing me to the point of this ramble occured the other day although it isn’t an unlikely event and can occur just about anywhere and at any time. Sometimes though you get to go some period of time without instance and it allows you to illusion yourself into equality.

I am a woman. Have been all my life. I’m a sexual being. Actually an extremely sexual being but I know were boundaries lie. I could never push myself on someone until they felt uncomfortable or inhuman. Not all men understand this rule.

When on my way to a movie the other night, while stopping at my boyfriends house, several men took it upon them selves to be aggressive in their remarks and their attempts at me. They weren’t together I should say just so you all know it wasn’t as scary as irritating and maddening.

I should let you know that were my boyfriend lives is proably the central zone of prostitution in San Diego and it is not unlikely to be propasitioned on this street. Usually if you ignore them keep your head down and continue walking they get the hint and move on. Not on this occasion and this is were my questions come in.

I was wearing tight clothing and heels. I wanted to look sexy for my boyfriend. I know were he lives I know what the situation is. I know and expect a propasition will occur. Am I supposed to hold myself accountable for the
overzealousness of these individuals. That’s what I get for dressing the way I was in the neighborhood I was in. It hardly seems fair that I have to change myself in order to avoid this sort akwardness.
Here is the ultimate in my frustation. Instead of John feeling some compassion towards me for the complete humiliation of someone harrassing me beyond that which anyone deserves regardless of profession he questioned what I had done. Well you know that you are not supposed to look at them right? If you don’t acknowledge them they go away. I’ve had it happen to myself as has Aaron and as long as you ignore them they keep moving. Now while it’s not that I don’t believe that men can and do also get harassed I have a hard time believing that the same kind of liberties are taken with them. But a woman being who they are as defined by society get the wonderful gift of having men be a little more entitled as to what they are are owed.
When I said ifelt demoralized John told me I was using the wrong word. But I wasn’t. I did feel demoralized. My morale had been shaken to the core. And I had once again been reminded of a womans place in this society. For as empowered as I am it took 10 minutes of extreme sexual harrassement to remind menwhere I still stand in the eyes of too many men who still walk this Earth.